[Assam] An open letter to the Prime Minister

[kamal deka]

Would you care to tell us the tales of maturity then?
KJD

On Thu, Aug 12, 2010 at 10:48 AM, henry narzary <hnarzary at yahoo.co.in> wrote:
> its a very cheap joke. this forum requires more matured handling....
>
>
>
>
> ________________________________
> From: kamal deka <kjit.deka at gmail.com>
> To: A Mailing list for people interested in Assam from around the world
> <assam at assamnet.org>
> Sent: Wed, 11 August, 2010 5:37:44 AM
> Subject: [Assam] An open letter to the Prime Minister
>
> In response to ABSU's recent demand for a separate Bodoland,An
> Assamese kharkhowa,inhabitant of Baksa district,wrote a letter
> addressed to the PM demanding a separate state for himself.Read and
> enjoy.
> KJD
>
>
>
> Dear Mr Prime Minister,
>
> I am 30 years old, fat, educated and I want my own state. To achieve
> this objective I have decided to proceed on a fast immediately...
> after my next " masor tenga meal", that is. (Considering my body mass index and
> fondness for trans fats, I have deemed this the most apt way to
> protest.)
>
>
> I now intend to break bread only after my 2-bedroom flat in Baksa
> district,the heartland of Bodos, is
> declared a state. The state will be known as Kalita Pradesh and its
> capital will be Kalita nagar -- which is what I will name my living
> room. The official language will be heavily accented English spoken
> with a lisp.
>
>
> I have decided to go in for this drastic move after discrimination
> against me based on my language, appearance, superior intellect and
> personal hygiene. I request you to consider my case vis-a-vis ABSU's
> demand for a state exclusively for the Bodos.
>
>
> My state abounds in man-made and (cow-made) resources, including
> manure from my potted plants and state-of-the-art sanitary fittings.  I
> intend to stand for CM and am confident that the residents -- my wife,
> my dog and the affectionate house mosquitoes  -- will cast their vote
> in my favour.
>
>
> Mr Prime Minster, I appeal to you to consider my case at the earliest.
> After Bodoland,Kalita Pradesh would become India's 30th state (if
> Gorkhaland, Bundelkhand, Harit Pradesh etc don't beat me to it).
> Thirty is such a nice, round number, don't you think? Since you are
> handing states around, why not add one more?
>
>
> While we are at it, let me bring to your notice that my pan-wala, my
> dhobi and a rather irritable bull who sleeps on the middle of a
> neighbouring road, all want their own states. They all allege
> discrimination and are all threatening to go on fast.
>
>
> I appeal to you sir, let's break up this beautiful state,known as
> Assam since time immemorial, at the earliest.
> Words like unity has  slipped into obsolescence. Why learn from the West.
> We don't care about Germany uniting or half of Europe becoming
> European Union. After all, we are the smartest race in the world. Let's
> have a new slogan: Be a Bodo,Kalita or Ahom first and break Assam into pieces.
> Sincerely,
> Biplob Kalita.
>
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